For my wife and me, our infertility was a gift. I know it sounds crazy, but it’s true. If I’m being transparent though, when we were in the midst of that terrible storm, it felt like a punishment. We had plans to have a big family. After months of negative pregnancy tests, embarrassing doctor’s visits, and invasive fertility treatments we received news that shattered our hearts and the dreams we had for ourselves. WHY, God? In my mind, I had already taken my daughter to her first Father/Daughter Dance. My wife had already attended her our son’s first ball game. We were simply waiting for reality to catch up with our dreams, desires, and goals. We wandered in the dark for months. You see, for us, it was more than a dream or desire. It was a promise we had received from God. Day after day we questioned why He would promise and not provide. It felt like a cruel joke. There were moments I felt my deepest longings and desires slipping through my hands before they even had a chance to take shape.
Almost fourteen years later I’ve discovered unanswered prayers are a gift. We tend to view each negative thing that happens as punishment from God. In most cases, that couldn’t be any further from the truth. 1 Samuel reminds us of Hannah. She was considered, by those around her, ‘barren.’ But scripture informs us, “….the Lord had shut up her womb.” [1:5] She wasn’t barren after all. Her inability to have children was God’s doing. If you haven’t noticed, God has His own way of doing things. Whether we like it or not, His will is always going to be accomplished. Consider life as a set of dominoes. From the creators point of view each domino is being placed in a specific order to create the end product. From our point of view, as that lonely domino, life seems confusing and doesn’t make much sense. We are left standing in some awkward position wondering why we’ve been placed here in the first place. From God’s point of view, He is arranging a magnificent work of art. He sees the big picture. We only see how we’re being pulled this way, or shoved in that direction. Hannah did eventually conceive and have a son. Her son would go on to anoint little sheep herder, David, as the next king. The lineage of David would make way for the arrival of Jesus, the son of God. I’ve often wondered what Hannah’s reaction would have been if she could have seen the end product while in the middle of her despair. My life is proof God will fulfill His promises. I sit behind this computer having attended many dances and activities with our daughter. My wife has attended many ball games and events with our son. God continues to fulfill His promises. But 99.9 % of the time it never happens the way we expect. Is your current situation a gift or punishment? You decide!
Closing remarks and encouragement: Delays are not denials. It’s just God’s way of saying, “Not yet! I’m working on something better for you!” He can and will do exceedingly abundantly more than we could ask or think. We might never experience the miraculous if we’re not willing to endure the struggle or have God rearrange our plans. His plans seem foreign and chaotic to us, but they always become a beautiful mess. There’s only One that could do something like that. That’s why I love Him. Have a blessed week, my friends!